Grass is greener?

 

It’s very easy in marriage to feel like the grass is greener.

It’s very easy to compare.

However nobody sees what goes on behind closed doors.

So be happy and content with what you have.

Cherish every moment.

Appreciate your partner for who they are and water your own garden green. 

{Image - D Sharon Pruitt}

Reflections: Boys + Girls

We had a pretty large bridal party. However, it was just too hard trying to decide who should and shouldn’t be included so we took a view and set a limit.

Working with such a large group of people, based in different countries was not always easy and communication was key. We can’t thank our best man and maid of honour for the fantastic organisational skills they possessed in pulling everything together!

The boys hired navy suits from Slaters and since I’m not a fan of flowers, you will notice no boutonnieres, as I thought they were a complete waste on money and didn’t add to anything.

When looking at bridesmaid dresses in the initial search stages, I soon discovered how overpriced they were, so I decided to source my own fabric and get a local seamstress to make them instead. My sister and I went back and forth with the design and in the end agreed on a strapless, fishtail dress.

The whole dress worked out around £60 and Obi the girl who made them was fantastic. She was super patient and even with one of my bridesmaids arriving from overseas on the Thursday before the wedding, she had her dress ready, fitted and completed in 24 hours! She even made alterations to my traditional attire from Nigeria as well.

Tip: It’s often cheaper to buy your own fabric and get dresses made to measure. Ask around for reputable seamstresses.

 

We had a rehearsal the day before and that was the first time everyone got to meet everyone else.

At the church…they walked down the aisle and the girls curtsied, while the men bowed, before taking their places.

 

Unbeknown to us, Jide went round and took individual snaps of all our bridal party! SB is missing as she was leading worship and the best man is also not there. I guess duty called!

The girls… My sister sourced matching headbands for them all!

 

The Boys…Don’t they look dappa!

Two weeks before the wedding, my sister got all the bridesmaid together for a lunch, where roles and responsibilities were assigned. This was really important because it ensured that everyone had a clear idea of what they were doing on the day and there was no confusion.

Tip: Assign roles to people, so that things don’t get missed and jobs are spread evenly.

   

All together now…

All images {Alakija & Co}

The Marriage Mirror

One of the best wedding gifts God gave you was a full-length mirror called your spouse. Had there been a card attached, it would have said, “Here’s to helping you discover what you’re really like!” – Gary and Betsy Ricucci

I love this quote, not because it is funny but because it is so true.

I recently bought the book Sacred Marriage by Gary Chapman as I’d heard great things about it and with a strap line that says ‘what if God designed marriage to make us holy, more than happy?’ – you know that it should make interesting reading! I am about halfway through the book and it is really challenging me and re-focusing my mind.

Personally I am finding marriage to be one those three way mirrors you get in the clothes shops, where you can see you front, your side and your back – all at once. Some days you look in to it and like what you see, other days you can swear that it is a fat mirror and it is totally lying to you!

A lot of the times in marriage, there is this constant desire to change the other person, to say well ‘it’s not me, it’s YOU’ or why are you not ‘X’ way or have ‘Y’ trait. You see a reflection of yourself you do not like, but it is the other person’s fault.

I have lived with myself long enough so I’m quite familiar with my ways and what I am like, but when Mr E tells me something about myself that I don’t like or want to hear, the child inside me likes to pout, deny and say ‘whatever – that is not true!’

Deep inside, however I know that God is using my dear husband as a mirror to help identify the areas of my life that are not very Christ like and need refining and I love him for it {even if I may not appear so at the time}!

“What marriage has done for me is hold up a mirror to my sin. It forces me to face myself honestly and consider my character flaws, selfishness, and anti-Christian attitude, encouraging me to be sanctified and cleansed and to grow in godliness.” Gary Chapman – Sacred Marriage

Gary talks about using ‘the revelation of your sin as a means to grow in the foundational Christian virtue of humility, leading you to confession and renouncement’. So as weak areas of my character and attitude are identified, it gives me an opportunity to work through them and get better, thus making my marriage better.

Do you view marriage as a mirror?

{Image source}

In My Kitchen: Chin Chin

So last night we decided to open a couple of our wedding presents and whip up a Nigerian delicacy.

Mr E and I were craving chin chin and having made numerous trips to our local African store spending lots of cash there this past two weeks, I decided to scour the internet to find a recipe I could make for us both.

I love my chin chin and especially like it hard and crunchy. The recipe I found was very easy to follow.

• 2 cups flour
• 1/3 cup sugar
• 2 teaspoons baking powder
• 1 egg
• 1/4 cup milk
• 1/4 cup butter, softened
• vegetable oil
• confectioners' sugar

Normally when I find a recipe in US format I have to convert to Metric but our Joseph Joseph Nest 8 did it for me. It had lots of measuring cups 1/2 cup right down to 1/4 and it made it so easy for me to measure everything out. {One of my favourite wedding gifts!}

The whole thing took about 2 hours to make, include prep and frying and they definitely turned out crunchy but not as hard as I would have personally liked.

• Combine flour, sugar, and baking powder in medium bowl.
• Stir in egg and milk until mixture is crumbly.
• With hands, work in butter until well blended.
• Let stand at room temperature for 30 minutes.

• In heavy skillet over medium heat, heat 1 inch of oil to 365 degrees F. {I used a deep fryer for this step}
• On lightly floured board with floured rolling pin, roll out half of dough to 1/16 inch thickness.

With pastry cutter or sharp knife, cut dough into strips, then squares

 

Repeat with remaining dough until gone.

Fry a few pieces at a time in hot oil until golden; drain on paper towels; cool.

Voila!

 

My husband’s verdict? First class!

Reflections...Vows

We originally decided to write our own vows which were going to be sat alongside the traditional ones.

For whatever reason it became something on the 'to do' list which never got done and a week before the wedding, we decided to leave it.

We both regret this slightly as we would have loved to have personalised this aspect of the day.

What we did manage to do though was send a little message to ourselves without the other seeing, which our Videographer took and we will see on the finish video {which we are STILL waiting for!}. Looking forward to seeing what Mr E said to me! :)

I came across this today, in my daily read and it brought me close to tears.

It made me wish we wrote our vows.

Did you write your own vows?

 
{All Images – Alakija & Co}