Venue hunting is sooo frustrating.
We have several variables which we need to attain to and the fact that we’re 12 weeks away {which seems like ages} it isn’t at all. June seems to be a month where brides have booked their venues a year, even two years in advance !?!
We need a place that can take several hundred people {a small intimate gathering isn't happening anymore}, will allow external caterers, is free on the day and doesn’t cost the earth.
I was making calls on lunch break today and one conversation went like this..
Me: Hi. I’m just calling to see if you have availability on the 26th June for a wedding reception for X number of people.
Venue*: Let me check…ah yes we do. Our X room can accommodate that number. Is it an English, Jewish or Asian wedding? {apparently there are only three types of weddings these days}
Me: Neither. It is Nigerian.
Venue: Oh right? {Pause} What kind of food will you be wanting?
Me: Nigerian
Venue: Well we do offer various Caribbean options?
Me: I’m not Caribbean
Venue: Well we would have to get the Chef to see if he can make any of your dishes as we don’t allow external caterers.
Me: That would fine if I knew the food would turn out okay. There is a difference between a chef following a recipe and a Nigerian making the food themselves
Venue: Well we don’t offer the option of outside caterers for health and safely reasons
Me: Rrrright. So what happens if Chef can’t make the dishes to our standards, what are our options? Also what you will charge me for what you will call ‘exotic’ dishes will be a lot higher than what my caterer will charge me. What happens then?
Venue: We would have to decline the booking.
Me: Wow! So you’re willing to lose business because you won’t allow a Nigerian couple to have Nigerian food at their own wedding?
Venue: Yes
Me: Hmmm. Okay.
Venue: Sorry we can’t help you.
This call made me so mad! How rude! Am I overreacting? A lot of venues seem to be reacting this way. You either have to fall into the English, kosher, Asian or Caribbean category or you are not catered for and that’s after you know they have the availability but they are not willing to be flexible. Anyone else experience similar frustrations?
* National Motorcycle Museum – shame on you!!!
No, you're right to be mad! It's the same way I felt with prices. So I just kept looking for a place that'd allow us to bring in our own drinks (since that was causing costs to sky rocket).
ReplyDeleteLooks like you guys will have to do the same thing, your first question will have to be: do you allow outside catering. If not, keep it moving.
When we rang around for catering they usually had three options - options like steak or chicken or vegetarian.
ReplyDeleteI've never come across anything like that.
Forget them. You'll find the perfect venue. I just know it.
We struggled with this very issue. It is hard, but I think that sometimes God is leaving our hands open for something better.
ReplyDeleteWe changed our venue twice... and eventually had to change our weddind date. As God would have it, with our new date in hand, the perfect venue appeared. Had we looked at this venue originally, we wouldn't have been able to book it (because of the date and the catering issue)..however on our actual wedding date, we were allowed our caterers etc! happy days!
keep the faith! : ) I know that the perfect place is sitting waiting for you x
@chichi
ReplyDeleteMy friends who got married in the states told me the same story of the venue thing, I can imagine how frustrating it is.
Girl, my advise is to look for a venue like a church and do the catering with a Nigerian lady, I still believe that certain hotels would let you bring Nigerian dishes, you have to really do your research, don't give up, this wedding must to happen in June , :=)
Have a good weekend.
WOW--HUN YOU MUST GET ON IT! i do see you had some mishaps in the past with changing your date..Am getting married in July however i was flexible with the date...Your first thing should have been to find your venue then send out save the dates...b/c now you are planning for June and trust me like you started places are already booked Or do not allow outside caterers...I got engaged then we looked for our venue I stared looking last August we had a place in mind but they were booked until OCTOBER...so we looked around and found a place but just had June or July in mind...anyway you guys came this far I pray all goes well for you..do u have a planner helping you? b/c they should be able to recommend some places for you guys...Keep the faith...Much blessings
ReplyDeleteLook into non-traditional venues, museums, halls. Not just hotels, some may charge you extra for using their caterers and if you provide a recipe for them, some are willing to work with you to make your dishes.
ReplyDeleteDon't get frustrated! You've come this far already.
I ran into the same issue! Being the type A person I am after I read your post I went to that Motorcycle Museum's website and it looks like they allow select outside Indian caterers. If the legal environment over there in England is anything like it is over here in the states they have to be fair to all races and ethnicities. I would call them again and ask them why do they allow select outside Indian caterers, but not licensed Nigerian caterers. Also I would inquire if there is a food and beverage minimum that needs to be met and if you meet that would they let you bring in an outside caterer to provide ethnic food. Most likely they will like that route b/c venues don't like to lose $$$ to outside vendors, but if you let them provide things like drinks and hor dourves it might work out. Let us know how it goes!
ReplyDeleteThanks for all your advice everyone.
ReplyDelete@ happynappybride, Mrs T and Mrs O - thanks guys, the search continues. I know the right venue is out there, that will tick the right boxes.
@ yankeenaijababe - we have found a really good Nigerian caterer who we want to work with. Problem is finding the venues who a)will let her cater b)won't make her jump through hoops to do so. One of the main challenges is the price with some of the hotels. They will allow you to bring outside catering but then will charge the earth for the privilege. Is it worth it? Not sure.
@ Anonymous - thanks for your comment. In our case, date took precedence. We have key family members flying in from abroad and getting the right weekend was important. We are also looking across two cities so that should hopefully give us more options.
@ Chichi - thanks for your suggestion. We've started to look a bit more 'out of the box' now.
@ Amy - you make a very good point. At the end of the day it's all about money. No one wants to lose money but it's about finding out what is the minimum they are prepared to take. I will pose the question.
I think perhaps the reason the venue gave the options of those types of weddings is because those are the ones they deal most often with and they probably feel like they are "experts" in it. I'm kind of glad they didn't say "yes, no problem, we can do your Nigerian wedding" and then the food ends up being subpar.
ReplyDeletePerhaps with time, if more Nigerian or African brides-to-be make statements like you did, they will consider the business they are losing by not investing in a chef that specializes in African cuisine, and be more open to serving you.
I like the idea of looking into non-traditional venues. It may end up being less expensive in the long run. I know you'll make it happen!
I feel your pain girl. Many of my girlfriends have shared their strife of trying to find a venue that will allow them to bring in their own caterer.
ReplyDeleteKeep the faith, you'll find something.
@KNaijaQueen - thanks for the encouragement.
ReplyDelete